One of the most valuable things my therapist ever said to me was, “sometimes you just have to fucking surrender.” What she meant was, a fundamental part of being human is being imperfect, and that you have to let life come to you. In the spirit of that sentiment, this playlist is named Meditations, Ruminations, and Reincarnation.
In the past few months it has been the soundtrack to the time I spend trying to let go of the notion that I can control what path I head down. Or at the very least, that a step in the wrong direction doesn’t mean I’m not worthy of what I want in life.
To that end, I have come to embrace the fluidity of life. Beyond that, I have come to embrace the fact that being imperfect doesn’t make me a bad person, despite what I have lead myself to believe.
Bruce Lee once said, “Empty your mind, be formless. Shapeless, like water. If you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle and it becomes the bottle. You put it in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Now, water can flow or it can crash. Be water, my friend.”
When I think about the trials and tribulations of the two years since I was diagnosed with OCD, I think of that. Anxiety can be a constant search for control in a stacked deck where that control is never really attainable. This playlist is dedicated to that journey. It comprises the feelings, both good and bad, of a long, long road. One, that I’m finally starting to see the end of.
The journey is different for all of us, but what I’ve learned is that while it is easier said than done, letting go of your faults is a good place to start. Sometimes you just have to fucking surrender.
ZLS
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